losttheright: (pic#2993681)
Molly Stearns ([personal profile] losttheright) wrote 2016-01-18 03:48 am (UTC)

Molly isn't really sure how she'd expected this to go, or even how she'd wanted it to. God knows it wouldn't have helped for him to be thrilled at the prospect, excited about it in a way she isn't sure it's possible for her to be. Hearing what Lee has to say about it now, though, hurts all the same, as if it's somehow her fault for putting them in this position, as if she'd somehow been able to make this happen this on purpose, on her own, as if she asked for this when it's the last fucking thing she wanted. He hasn't said anything that isn't just as true for her, but it still feels like something she did.

Or maybe that's just what happened before rearing its head again, Stephen throwing her mistakes in her face like she was the only one who made them, instead of the truth of it, Morris being equally culpable. Lee hasn't actually suggested that he thinks anything like that is the case here, and it isn't fair not to give him the benefit of the doubt. At least he's being honest with her. That's all either of them can do right now.

"I never said I was," Molly replies, with a dark, humorless laugh. "I mean, Jesus Christ, Lee, I'm twenty-four years old, I have a recent promotion, work going fucking crazy, and an election coming up. You're still in law school. We've barely been together more than a year. I don't even know if I want kids at all, and if I did... It wouldn't be now."

She has to stop to remind herself to breathe, having said more than she'd thought she would, still looking like her entire world has fallen apart. Maybe it hasn't, but whatever they do here, she has a feeling that there's going to be something irreparably broken even so. That might be the worst part of this. At least if it were just her, she could make a decision on her own and let that be that. "So... You know, we have options. We can figure something out. Okay?"

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